we're down a nanny

i placed baby in her stroller on friday and my stomach sank. it smelled of cigarette smoke. i confronted the nanny on sunday. the conversation was a blur but i remember hearing something like she was with someone who smokes, and a joy ride in her car, and my head was spinning. i handed her a paycheck and tried to keep my head secured to the rest of my body . i promptly had a nightmare that baby nearly drowned in the shower drain. yesterday morning i sent an e-mail to the nanny explaining her termination. we’re screwed.